Problem:
After reading the case below, discuss the specific events in Leo's life that have contributed to his difficulty with attachment and how those events have impacted him. How has his background with his birth parents and the foster care system impacted his ability to attach to Don and April? Cite at least two examples from the text. Next, examine your own life and the attachments that you had to your parents/caregivers. How would you describe those attachments and either the negative or positive impacts that has had on your relationships? What can you do to work towards overcoming any attachment issues that you identified? Lastly, cite one biblical example of a family with attachment issues from Scripture and describe how it impacted the family. Need Assignment Help?
Leo: The Boy Who Talks With A Crow
The example described in this section follows a real-life intervention that Kim Golding carried out with a young child and his adoptive parents. The family has kindly given permission for Kim to share this, and all names and identifying details have been changed. This example demonstrates that there are many "nuts and bolts" during the course of DDP, depending on the unique needs of each child and family. What is consistent throughout, however, is that DDP begins with the parents and the strong premise that it is they who will provide the child who has developmental trauma with the most life-changing joint experiences upon which to build new stories and a coherent narrative.
A young, thin boy with a tousle of dark hair approaches me. He is friendly, with a lively curiosity and a bubbly, infectious charm. He chats away as if he has always known me. It is hard not to be captivated by him. Tall for his 4 years, just now he seems a lot older. I see no sign of the angry, aggressive child I have been hearing about for the past year. Neither do I see the scared child I know is within. He knows what my name is, who I am, and that I have been working with his mom and dad, helping them to take care of him. In truth, he has not come to see me today but for an assessment with my trainee clinical psychologist. Leo, however, has targeted me for his charm, he knows who he needs to be safe with, understanding that I am the boss here, an unerring instinct that only comes from early frightening experience of relationships.
Early Experience
Leo was born following a pregnancy that will have been stressful for him, experience already imprinting on the early development of his nervous system. His birth mother probably did not care for herself well. She is recorded as being underweight during the pregnancy. It is likely that she lived in a climate of violence and fear. Labor was prolonged, and delivery difficult, but mother and child were discharged the following morning. The health visitor notes describe his mother as not coping from the earliest of visits. Behind these early notes there is an image of Leo left to cry in a climate of stress and recriminations. His birth father is a shadowy, angry figure in the background. Extended family appear supportive but are probably complicit in this frightening early environment. Soon there are bigger concerns as Leo is found with injuries to his body. Enough is enough, and Leo is removed when he is 5 weeks old.
Leo's first foster placement is with an elderly couple, soon to retire. They mean well, but the environment is unstimulating. When he is 10 months old, Leo moves again. These foster carers are kind and committed. They care for Leo well and work hard to give him a successful transition to adoption. As is usual practice while decisions are being made, Leo has weekly contact with his birth family until he is a year old. It is hard to imagine the confusion and fear of a small child who finds himself cared for by so many people, some strange and unfamiliar but safe, without pain, and then the sudden reoccurrence of the familiar smells and sounds, accompanied by the visceral fear that is associated with the other people. Finally, all of these people gone, and a new family, new sights, new sounds, new smells, and always the worry: When will the pain and loss come again?
Moving to Adoption
At 17 months of age, Leo moves to live with his adoptive parents, April and Don. Like Leo, they are white and British. They have a birth son, Michael, and are completing their family through adoption. Leo, well into toddlerhood, is already a lively, active child. There is none of the so-called honeymoon period: Leo arrives as a demanding, determined, self-sufficient child, initially small in stature, but already mature for his age, at least in outward appearance.
Over the next couple of years, Leo increasingly presents as a highly controlling child. He is oppositional, he refuses to sit in his pushchair, threatens to undo his seat belt, and generally opposes the many day-to-day things that a toddler needs to do within the family routines. He can also be very stubborn: He has refused to eat for 3 to 4 days at a time. If he does not want to do something he will rage: He goes rigid, shakes, and is very difficult to calm. He becomes angry when his feelings are named but sometimes will tolerate being held until he can calm. Leo demonstrates these same behaviors at the nursery where he attends while mom works. Sleep appears to be a refuge for Leo: He sleeps well and excessively. His bed feels like a place of safety, he keeps precious things there, and he rarely gets up in the morning to seek out his parents.
There is little sign of Leo being able to use parents as a secure base. If hurt, he actively pushes them away. The outside world is, however, a source of greater anxiety. He appears confident, but Leo's hypervigilance is evident: He scans and notices every detail within moments of entering a room. He takes control through his charm, his demands, and sometimes his oppositional and aggressive behaviors. He brings the anxiety home with him, directed as anger toward mom. Because of ghosts from the past, he cannot seek her for comfort despite his need. He fears the pain she might inflict and so he attacks the source of confusion.
There are some glimmers of progress within the first years. He begins to approach mom and dad, at least with minor hurts, and he has allowed himself to be vulnerable after a rage, sobbing and allowing mom to comfort him.