Revise your email to sales associates at Herman Miller.
Revise your draft email to Herman Miller sales associates (from Exercise 10). What changes will you make to improve the message? Follow these steps for the revision process:
a. Read the email once, revising for content. Make sure that all needed information is included, no unneeded information is included, and the information is presented in a logical sequence.
b. Read the email a second time, revising for style. Make sure that the words, sentences, paragraphs, and overall tone are appropriate.
c. Read the email a third time, revising for correctness. Make sure that grammar, mechanics, punctuation, and word choice are error free.
Exercise 10:
Write a draft email to the sales team at Herman Miller.
Using the principles discussed for effective email communication, write a draft email to a team of sales associates. Imagine that you work for Herman Miller, a company that sells high-end office furniture. Today, the associates typically make phone calls and send online brochures to prospective clients. You believe that you can increase sales if the associates make personal visits instead. In your email, encourage associates to visit at least three businesses each week.
Use a respectful, encouraging tone, and provide enough reasons to convince the sales associates that personal visits will increase business. Invent whatever details you need to make your email realistic.