"I am learning all the time. The tombstone will be my diploma." Eartha Kitt
It was the last mentor observation, the eight over a period of two semesters of the fieldwork course, when my mentor told me that I have improved a lot, and that she can really see a big difference in my performance, I was so pleased to hear those words that mark the end of the seven semesters diploma, but I felt it is not the end, it is just the beginning of what I think is an endless journey of learning how to teach.
This improvement in my performance and professional development was due to what I have learned through the three activities I have participated in the field work course, in the mentoring observation, peer observation, and critical friendship groups. Looking back and reflecting on those activities I can pinpoint some important critical incidents that really impacted me and my teaching.
One of those incidents was in my seventh mentor observation, when I was teaching a class of three students a science lesson, and the goal was for them to learn the difference between solid, liquid, and gas, and I wanted my mentor to focus on the cooperative learning and interaction among students.
The lesson went on as prepared, I started by introducing the topic and showing a video about the different states of matter, during and after watching the video, I was explaining and asking questions and then I showed them practically the ice, water and steam, after that the students worked cooperatively to sort different objects according to their states of matter, and fill in a worksheet.
It all went well, and the students were interested, but I was anxious as I felt that the students didn't understand, and they were guessing the answers, and they were all answering in the same time and copying each others' answers, I tried to organize it and ask each one by turn, but they kept answering together, I wanted them to just think and answer spontaneously to assess their understanding, but the result was a failure to assess anything.
That really made me feel bad, as I felt that the lesson was a failure, but my mentor's comments showed me that it wasn't as bad as I thought, there are good points and it was an interesting lesson, and the students were engaged, and pinpointed the problem, which is the lack of organization, and it could be solved by being more structured in asking questions by giving each a turn to answer, and not allow them to answer together, to be sure that they understood. I was really surprised to receive such a feedback and such positive comments, and that made me think, that in some cases I judge the lesson as a whole as a failure or as a success, but actually I need to break it up, and analyze it, and see what was good and what went wrong, and that's how we can learn from our weaknesses and work on improving them, actually I do this with others, but I get more judgmental with myself, but after this incident I learned that I have to be less judgmental with myself as we others, to be able to change and improve.
Moving on to the peer observation, where I really learned a lot from my dear colleagues, but I picked one of the most interesting lessons I observed, it was an English creative writing lesson with a diverse group of 7 students from grade 6 and up, the goal of the lesson was that the students write a short descriptive essay. The teacher started the lesson in a very interesting way as she positioned 7 shoe boxes one in front of each student, the students were curious and kept guessing what could be inside the box, then she allowed them to open, there was one shoe or sandal in each box. It was surprising, the students were so excited, and kept examining the shoes and sandals, and then they started describing them, they wrote about the brand, size, manufacturer, the style, the heals the color, and other things too, and they were so much engaged in the lesson, and asked the teacher for help. In the end of the lesson they did well and had a fun and exciting lesson. It was exciting for me too, and it helped me to think out of the box, think of different teaching methods, and different materials that can be used. This lesson gave me ideas that helped me in my own lessons; I used to use videos, games, cards in my English lesson, but after this lesson I started getting things from home, toys, things from the kitchen, fruits, vegetables and many other different things, that made my lessons more interesting and fun, and that helped my students reach their goals and become more engaged in the lesson, while having fun, and the results were great.
Moving on to the critical friendship group, which is a really good source of learning, inspiration, and a great way to share thoughts and experiences. It is hard to pick only one critical incident, as there are several incidents that were so critical that really made me stop and think and changed my way of thinking. But I will talk here about the last critical friendship group meeting, we used learning from texts protocol, named block party, I was a participant, we started by reading the quotes, picked three quotes that we could relate to and that would inspire us, after that we started sharing our choices of quotes and talk about them, and even share stories on how those quotes apply to our practical life, and we commented on each others' quotes.
The quotes were all great and so inspiring and talking about them with other colleagues gave them even more depth on how each of us can relate to a specific quote, for me there was one quote that really touched me deeply, and although there is nothing new about it but the way it is stated, was really dramatic, "I've come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. It's my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess a tremendous power to make a child's life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or de-humanized." Dr. Haim Ginotte
This one really struck me, although there is nothing new about it, but having it stated this way is really frightening, and It made more concerned and be more careful not only on what I teach but also on how I act. It made me think of the big and important role I have in my students' lives, this puts a huge responsibility on my shoulders, as teaching is much more than delivering the curriculum, it's about giving love and most giving your life.